June is Pride Month, and I’m so fortunate to live in a city that celebrates it to the fullest – Toronto. Pride Toronto organizes events all month long, from concerts to the grand finale Pride Parade. Since ZoZo is getting older, I thought this year* would be the perfect time to speak to her directly about Pride and what this means for many people and families. So when she randomly asked me to paint her face, I thought “let’s do rainbow and learn about Pride!”.

Pride Face Painting

Zozo initially wanted me to paint a giraffe on her face, however I suggested a ‘pride rainbow’ and she was all for it! As she stayed very still so I could get the rainbow just right, I spoke to her about how important Pride is for many of our family and friends.

She was so incredibly delighted with the results of her Pride Month Face Painting.

Speaking About Pride

As I did her makeup (painted her face), I spoke to her about Pride and how important it is for many of our family and friends. It is important for them to safely be themselves, as well as be free to celebrate who they are in their spaces and in general spaces. My goal is for my daughter to learn that love is love, and that everyone deserves the same right to love regardless of their sexual orientation. In addition, I aim to create an environment where sexual orientations or gender identity are normalized and not taboo to her, from respecting the pronouns of a person to understanding that not all families are part of a heterosexual nuclear model.

Top 5 Speaking Points:

– People are and should be proud of who they are and of who they love, and they particularly celebrate this during Pride.
– Those that identify as 2SLGBTQ+ has fought hard for this right to love, and are still working hard today. This is an ongoing process and it we should do everything we can to help.
– The colours of the rainbow flag stand for the diversity within the 2SLGBTQ+ community. I mentioned that there are different flag variations within the 2SLGBTQ+ community, such as black and brown stripes to represent racialized people.
– Not all families are the same. While her parents are a cisgender opposite sex couple, other families may have two mommies or a parent who may not use the term mommy/daddy to identify themselves (She is quite familiar with the diverse types of families as it’s something we speak of very openly).
– Most importantly, I told her that mommy and daddy love her no matter what and that she should always be proud of who she is and who she loves.

The Approach

I spoke to my daughter in terms that she could understand. I asked her if there were any words I used that she didn’t know the meaning of and I explained them to her. I also made sure to take my time and ask her about what she thought. I wanted to ensure we were talking about this together, having a conversation, and it wasn’t just about me talking at her.

Speaking to children about Pride early on removes the taboo from these topics, not only from your home but within your community and society. There is no need to speak of these topics in a super serious setting in an awkward dinner table conversation at the “right age”.  I would encourage you to make these topics a part of your every day life, and not treat it as something unusual or sensitive. It is also important to remember that you need to lead by example as to how you speak of or treat those in the LGBTQ+ community cause your children are watching and learning.

I hope that the way I approached the topic of Pride with my daughter helps you speak openly to your children about Pride and the 2SLGBTQ+ community. Having these conversations early on is an excellent way of establishing that open communication with a little ones from a young age. They will establish the trust of speaking to you openly about various topics, which is an essential part of a parent-child relationship.

Have you spoken to your kids about Pride? Let me know how you went about it in the comments below!

*This article was originally written in June 2018, and has been updated in May of 2021.